avra k’davra...

Europe was given a choice between dishonor and war. They chose dishonor and had war. 

 

1939, Germany invades Poland.

 

The world did little to challenge the German War Machine. The same could be said about the genocide that took place before, during and after the war.  Most of Europe watched, while others helped commit atrocities.  Some decided taking the lives of others so that their own would be spared, was acceptable. This is a tale of what led some to that acceptance. A tale, from the Kabbalah. A tale that asks, “Is it acceptable to take human life?”

 

EAST POLAND

Sometime after the Nazi invasion

 

My name is Rachel and I survived tricks of the Dybuk. In the end, I lost everyone. This is how I remember…

 

After the German Blitzkrieg flattened our army, the Gestapo began to organize the extermination of the Jews. The police officers in my small town, 15km west of the Russian border, were asked to exterminate the Jewish families that lived there. My family among them.  The police were coaxed by a Nazi Colonel. An SS officer with no soldiers. I remember he took quarter in the old Feinman’s estate. After their suicide, occurring 2 weeks prior. The Colonel offered to spare the lives of anyone who aided his comrades in the extermination of the Jews. Some took pleasure in their survival.

 

A Jewish man living in my town. A pariah due to a violent past. He made a similar deal with the Colonel and joined the ranks of the Nazi sympathizers. He was granted immunity and the title of Kapo. But for a heavy price. The Colonel ordered the Kapo to hang a child who had attempted to flee.  My mother knew his father. The boy’s mother died during childbirth. A lucky woman.

 

No one, not even the Kapo, had looked into the eyes of the Colonel. Acting out of desperation and haste, deals were made to an apparition. A shadow. A barley visible SS officer sitting at the end of a room. Behind a desk. In and out of visibility. Like the flicker of a candle.  

 

The police and soon to be Kapo marched us to a bridge. The child was taken to the top of that bridge. They bound his hands behind his back and attached a rope to those bindings. Then the boy was fastened with a noose. The Kapo was told to push the boy over the bridge. He reluctantly complied. A backwards hanging. You could hear the boy’s arms breaking the next town over. He died silently, gasping. Twitching. Unable to scream from the pain he must have felt. I just wanted to go inside because it was cold. I wanted to stop seeing his face.

 

Now the Kapo had support from the police. He was given new living quarters. A hot bath. Warm clothes. Food. Sitting down to eat he heard a knock on his door. Answering it, he found an old acquaintance and her daughter, freezing. That acquaintance was my mother. That daughter was me.

 

There was not enough room for me with my family. I was offered to the Kapo in return for food. The Kapo was angry with the idea. He closed the door abruptly. The Kapo returned moments after with some food, snatching me away from my mother. For my benefit.

 

I sat and watched the Kapo eat. He looked back and assured me he was not a rapist. He explained how he despised my family for not being kind to him. Judging him for his crimes. He explained to me, it was his turn to make others miserable now. Then he was silent. After a few moments the Kapo threw me some food. It landed on the floor. Where I ate. It was my first meal that week. It was the best meal I’ve ever had.

 

I was told for now I could sleep in his bed. He’d sleep on the floor. He preferred the floor. Said it was the only way he could sleep after his time in the Gulag. He was sent for killing his brother. When they were young. When they were innocent. The Kapo sat and finished his dinner, while softly crying to himself. I cried as well. Meanwhile, the elders of my town gathered where the boy remained hanging. The rope was too thick to cut, so they lower the mutilated body from the bridge. It lay motionless. No one dare approach. They discussed what was next for their people.

 

Deciding not to bargain with the Colonel, they begrudgingly used the Kabbalah to summon, the Golem. Many elders warned that the Golem would continue to grow and no longer listen to commands.  After a heated debate, it was decided acting in kind was appropriate.  Kill or be killed. The cycle continued. The monster was summoned. After several elders performed an incantation and spelled Emet (Hebrew for, “truth”) on the ground, the Golem rose. Rising out of the earth, it sucked in its surroundings.  The monsters body absorbed rocks, glass, nails, medal… and the deceased child laying close by. In doing so, the Golem became tied to the bridge by his neck. When it became large enough, the Golem pulled against the rope. Trying to run off. Regardless of the tearing it caused along the monster’s neck, it was relentless.

 

An elder ran to the top of the bridge to tear at the rope with a piece of medal he picked up. After the elder delivered a few blows to the rope a tear began to form. It was enough for the creature to snap the rope. The monster now turned to face the elders. The elders looked away from the Golems face, in horror. One man screamed at the confused Golem to go and protect the village from the violent police! The creature complied, scurrying off. Searching for victims. 

 

The creature stumbled upon a small group of Jews, trying to enjoy what bit of freedom they had. From the cover of darkness, the Golem lurked. Deciding whether to attack. It must have realized the Jewish Families, looked like the elders that created it. It moved on and instead, attacked the small towns police headquarters. The Golem mangled 4 policemen beyond recognition. Then ran off before it was seen. I heard the bodies were torn to pieces. Some had arms removed. The way you might pull an arm off a cooked turkey. Limbs snapped in half like broken fish.

 

The police believed the towns people had retaliated. Without the Nazi Colonel giving orders, the police responded. People began murdering autonomously. No longer was the Colonel to blame.  The remaining police and Kapo gathered us for another public execution.  The police chief yelled that he had no choice but to execute four people in retaliation for the aggression perpetrated against his fellow officers. The police chief explained that one of his nephews was among the dead. The police chief picked four men for execution. These men were told they would not be killed by any of the police. Instead they would be left outside. Overnight. Where they would freeze to death. The four men were then asked to pick four others. They obliged. They were then undressed. Too cold to stand still, they began walking in a circle. The Golem must have been watching from a distance.  Because after that night, he became confused. It no longer discerned friend from foe. Everyone was the enemy.

 

After the gathering, one of the elders opposed to creating the Golem approached the Kapo. He confided in him their mistake. Due to the brutality of the murders and the mysteriousness of the elders the Kapo was compelled to believe. The Kapo was also unsure of the Colonel. The Colonel did not seem human, and his requests were odd. The Kapo remembered being asked by the Colonel if he was able to see his face through the darkness. The Kapo, afraid of being killed, responded that he could indeed make out the Colonel’s face. The truth was, he could not. Regardless, he was told to step back. It was obvious the Colonel did not want to be seen. But why? The Kapo began to think about the darkness and strange occurrences around him. The elder told the Kapo that he had seen enough killing to believe the devil was real. 

 

Oddly, it gave him hope. It meant Hashem, God, must also be real.  Which meant, through the darkness there might be light. A much greater light than anything we’ve ever seen.  A warm light that lays gently over your skin, like a blanket. Makes you feel safe.  The elder explained that maybe this light was waiting for all of us.  On the other side of the darkness. If we survive the test. The elder walked away and in that moment, the Kapo realized his mistake. He immediately thought to confront the Colonel and take back his soul!

 

As the Kapo stepped into the Colonels quarters he could hear a radio broadcast. The Colonel asked if the Kapo could hear the announcer. The Kapo said he could hear what was being said but could not see where it was coming from. The Colonel silenced the Kapo. Telling him to listen. The broadcaster was giving a synopsis of the war in Europe. The British Army was close to annihilation. The French had surrendered. Mother Russia had sided with the Axis. It appeared, hopeless. The Kapo breathed deeply, realizing the time to fight for his own survival was now! He again began to feel, justified. Then, the broadcast became, more personal. The broadcaster seemed to be asking those listening to save themselves. The broadcaster then said, “All Europeans are being advised to cooperate with the invaders. Please, just listen. You deserve to live… even if others die. Even if others, die by your hand…’ the transmission went to static. The Kapo was suspicious and the Colonel sensed it.

 

The Kapo was asked,

 

“Do you believe Europe will be rescued? If so, by whom? The world is complicit!”

 

The colonel told the Kapo that he may walk away from his position at any time, to join the others as they march to their deaths! The Kapo froze in fear, hearing his alternative. The Kapo asked,

 

“What march? I thought the villagers were to be shot?”

 

The colonel explained the local police hardly had enough ammunition to protect the town, let alone kill everyone in it with a bullet. But, a march along the old unused train tracks would prove to be quite deadly for those not dressed properly.

 

I was told we had to march to where the tracks were operational. There, we would need to jump on the trains to Auschwitz and other camps, as they passed by. Those who survived the march would either be crushed by the passing trains or freeze to death sometime later. Anyone resisting was to be shot.

 

The Kapo boldened by curiosity asked, “Where are your men?”

 

The colonel paused before answering, angrily…

 

“What?”

 

The Kapo nervously asked his question again, only this time he asked the Colonel if he could provide more men. SS possibly. “To round up the villagers?” The Colonel did not respond for some time. Perhaps circumspect. The Kapo whispered into the darkness… “Sir?”

 

Wind passed through the house with a howl as the Kapo tried to make out the face of the Colonel. The Colonel suddenly responded, rapidly.

 

“I would hate to think you and the police are incapable of carrying out a simple march! Pitty…”

 

The Kapo quickly responded, “It will not be a problem, colonel! I am at your service!”

 

Another breeze blew through the house. The colonel responded. “Good.”

 

The Kapo left the meeting with the Colonel, confused and uncertain. But as he exited the colonels quarters he noticed the eight villagers selected for execution. They were now covered in snow. They had frozen to dead, while standing. The site solidified his resolve.

 The Kapo returned to his quarters. There, I emerged from hiding and explained I had been given information from my mother about a possible means of escape. Through the elders. The Kapo was displeased. He felt others were jeopardizing his life! Taking advantage of his kindness! Enraged, he pushed me to the bed and lifted his hand. As if to strike me.  Then, it was as if though… I heard a whisper. He heard it too.

 

“Kill…”

 

The Kapo froze. Looking at me. He lowered his hands. Then the Kapo said, Dayenu! “Enough!” Immediately a draft blew through the quarters. Everything became, colder.

The Kapo explained that he could help me escape. But the plan must be carried out with haste. Tomorrow began the march. By noon, the village was to be moving. The Kapo explained that he would help the other villagers with their exodus, while I slipped away to the river. The river would lead to a camp of resistance, hidden in the woods. After he explained his plan, he paused.

 

He asked if I believed God would forgive him.

I said, “Yes.”

What else could I say?

The Kapo smiled. He knew I was lying. He must have thought, he would pay for what he had done. Judgment had passed.

 

That night, the Golem once again picked a group of police to attack. They were tending to their horses when the Golem mutilated their bodies. Ripping off their limbs and even shaking a 300-pound man to death. It shook the grown man like a child. The Golem was now more aggressive and larger. The Golem finished with the police and turned his attention to some of the villagers he saw in the distance. The handful of villagers laughed and danced with one another. One of the men became overly flirtatious. The woman he was fliting with said, “No,” as politely as she could. The man laughing, began to back off… then he noticed the women starring at something behind him.

 

She screamed! Then, the Golem began mutilating that man.

 

The Golem began killing Jews! It began, killing its creators!

 

There was a pounding at the Kpao’s door. It must have been around 5am. The Kapo opened the door to see 3 of the elders standing. Yelling. Screaming at the Kapo for help. I remained in hiding. The Kapo told them to calm down. One of the elders yelled and pointed,

 

“Look!”

 

The Kapo watched as a villager ran for his life with the Golem closing in behind him. Grabbing him from behind the Golem removed the man’s head. All taking place right next to the 8 people who had froze to death in a circle, while standing.

 

The Kapo couldn’t believe his eyes!

 

“How could we be so blind! All of these games are madness!”

 

He yelled to sound the alarm. The Kapo ran to the police station where he turned the crank of an air raid siren. The village began to wake up. Then, people, began screaming. You could hear their bones breaking! The Golem continued his rampage! You could hear the monster. It sounded, like it was gasping for air! It wouldn’t stop!

 

The Kapo ran to the Barracks where the remaining Police were stationed. He yelled at them as they were waking, confused.

 

“There is a demon! A demon killing everyone! All of us must leave at once!”

 

The police laughed. One of the police officers approached the Kapo and punched him in the stomach. The Kapo fell to the ground, gasping for air. The police officer explained the Kapo had overstepped his authority. There was silence as the police officer walked to the door of the barracks. Here he was violently grabbed by his head. The police officer screamed as his limbs were heard breaking! The Kapo yelled,

 

“Run, you fools! Run!”

The other police, and villagers began moving toward the main road with haste. Many had gathered with belongings. They were prepared to march. The Kapo and police ran at the group, yelling for everyone to leave their things! To run for their lives! Some took the suggestion seriously. Others were too confused. They did not move fast enough. They stayed behind and were killed by the Golem. The Kapo looked to one of the elders while fleeing. He told the elder he must go back to his quarters, to release me from my hiding place. The Kapo told me that the elder looked over at him and said, “Take me as well! I’m too valuable! I can create the Golem!” Before the Kapo could respond, the elder was killed. The Kapo ran off… never again looking back.

 

The Kapo burst into the room where I was hiding. I could see him through the boards beneath his bed. I watched him approach and wondered, what was next? I thought, maybe I had been caught. The truth was far more disturbing. The Kapo continued yelling. “We need to leave, now!” I did not argue. We ran together, to the river. There, the Kapo walked with me, for a few moments. Explaining briefly what he believed had happened. That is how I know this story. 

 

I was told to continue east until the forest grew too thick to see. There, I was to start yelling, “Emet!” The resistance would hear me. Then rescue me. If I was lucky. The Kapo began to run back to the village. I yelled after him, confused…

 

“Where are you going?”

 

The Kapo looked back and said, “I must undo a deal with the devil!” I responded one last thing…

 

“You asked if I think God would forgive you?”

 

The Kapo looked back. His eyes white with wonder. “Yes?” He replied.

 

“God is forgiveness.”

 

I remember saying this as quickly as I could. A part of me no longer believed in the lord. A part of me no longer believed in forgiveness. I saw the Kapo reflect, for a moment. Then I fled into the woods. The Kapo must have ran back to the village. He was never seen again. The rest is legend…

 

The Kapo flew into the Colonel’s quarters to confront him! They were empty. Now brightly lit, the Kapo could examine clearly the area he thought the Colonel once sat.  Objects, shapes and shadows. These things could have easily accounted for what the Kapo believed was a figure. A darkness that was, a demon. As he walked through the empty house, investigating, he thought back to a conversation he had with the Dybuk…

 

Colonel

You judge yourself too harshly, Kapo. You did what you did to survive. As did everyone else. The world will take pity on your people. The Jews.  You will be given… something for yourselves. A refuge. You’ll have to guard this new home. You’ll have to survive there. Once again, you’ll be asked. Kill, or be killed? You feel good about this? Your life? Being alive?

 

Kapo

Sometimes. I enjoy my life, and I’m grateful. Other times I look in the mirror…

and all I see is a monster.

 

The Kapo looks up from his thoughts and into a mirror. He sees standing behind him the Golem. The face of the monster is revealed… it is the mutilated, choking face of the boy the Kapo hung to save his own life.

THE END